From a very early age (no seriously check the grammar in this quote) I've had an "I do it myself" attitude. That definitely has its pros and cons. I've made a lot of people mad by taking this approach in life, but I've also made those same people very proud when I actually succeed at what I'm trying to accomplish. This applies to moving out to Tahoe. "I do it myself." However, I've learned that doing it alone can be pretty taxing when your across the country from everything and everyone you've ever known. Sometimes all you want to do is run home to Mom and Dad's for some good comfort food and a big hug. And sometimes you just can't do that. I knew that by graduating I would truly be stepping out into the real world and on my own. What I didn't realize was just how much I took for granted. Here I'm learning how to do things on my own, everything, even if I don't want to. I mean I've definitely got friends here who would drop anything to help me, but the things I'm learning I have to do on my own...A part of growing up, I suppose. You'd think that with a college degree under my belt (the fine institution of UGA, I might add) that I'd be good to go. Well, there's a lot more to life than what you'll find in a text book. I actually am very proud to be a student who may not have graduated at the top of the class (and definitely not at the bottom either), but I did graduate with common sense and the capability to manage a balanced life. However, there are just some things that can only be learned by experience.
I'm learning how to live my life here and enjoy every moment of it while staying close to those at home. Living far away from so much that you love is difficult and I'm learning how to be in Incline and still be as much of a part of home as I can. I tell you what, the time zones get me every time. They make it very hard to keep in touch. I'm learning that I can be here and love it and still love home. Your heart grows. When it finds something new, it doesn't always have to knock something out of the way. It learns to make room and share. But just an fyi to everyone out there...yes, I stalk you on facebook. Yes, I keep up with your twitter updates. Yes, I love to look at pictures of everyone simply because I miss you and I want to see what you're up to. I love getting updates from people. It may take me a while to get back and I'll be the first to admit that I'm horrible at returning phone calls, texts, emails, etc. I love getting them, they make my day. But I usually check it or read it, then something comes up (or I'm just really tired), and I just plain forget to get back to you...I will eventually, though, I promise. So seriously, drop me a line, tell me about your life, update me, let me know what's going on. It makes me so happy to hear what's going on back home and how y'all are doing.
I'm learning to take risks. Life's about taking risks. You might fail, in fact, I have. It happens. But with failure comes learning from your mistakes and where to go next. You just have to hop right up and head down a different path now that you know where not to go and what not to do. And then again, you might win. But you never know. And I can't let life pass me by while I wait for something good to fall into my lap, it doesn't work that way. I have to try and I have to take risks. Well, here it is. I risked everything for a new life in Tahoe. I didn't know how it would turn out. I didn't know if I'd make any new friends, or if I'd fit in. I didn't know if I'd like my job or if I'd be any good at it. I didn't know if I would succeed or be able to make it on my own. I had no idea. I came to Tahoe with a dream. To begin a new life, not a new me, just a different part of me. I needed to expand. Get out. Experience. See the world. I am here because of the love and support of some very dear people. I am so blessed to have people who love me and care for me. Those of you who call to say 'you're in my prayers', or those who write to say 'I'm thinking of you'...That's what gets me through my day. That is what motivates me, helps me, gets me going. I'm in a new place all by myself but yet I'm completely surrounded by the love and support of so many familiar voices. Thats is incredibly comforting.
I'm learning that not everyone is like me. And that it's ok. I mean, I definitely knew this before. But here not only are there people different than I, but now I'm the only one who's different. But it's actually working out pretty well, I've turned into the token southern girl I suppose you could say. I've found myself a pretty great group of friends out here. We have a lot in common, but a lot of differences. We all come from different places and bring different aspects to the table. However, we share similar opinions in respect to important things like character, values, and work ethic. It's nice to have those "few good men" (or women) around and although we're each very different, I know I could go to them with anything and they'd be there for me in a heartbeat. There have already been so many times I've thanked God for putting such wonderful new friends in my life to help me through some difficult times, to be my friend, and just plain get me acquainted with a new town and unfamiliar life.
I'm learning how to be responsible for myself. Out here I have no one to fall back on. This can most easliy be expressed through my financial responsibility. I'm learning to get by from paycheck to paycheck. Not that my parents wouldn't help me out if I really needed it, but I'm learning that what I make is what I got. No one's going to pay my rent, or take me shopping, or buy my groceries. I'm learning to make ends meet where they have to and where to cut the extra spending. I'm just so happy to have a full time job and friends in the same boat as I am. We are all on the same page about how and how not to spend our money. It's ok when you're poor....just as long as you've got people right there along side of you. You learn to do poor things together. Anyone looking to graduate college soon, I'll teach you my tricks. But, I'll admit this learning point is a work in progress, and will be for some time.
I'm still learning...I'm learning that it's good to do things myself, but that's it is ok to turn to others for help.
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